When You Need Inspiration to Keep Fighting…
Some days, what you need the most is the inspiration to keep fighting…
In 2017 my dad was diagnosed with Small Cell Lung Cancer and a rare disorder called Paraneoplastic syndrome. In a split second, our whole lives changed, and cancer became our “new normal.”
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Even now, in the most stressful and terrifying time of our lives… my dad continues to be my biggest teacher and my strongest role model.
No matter how crazy and intense this roller coaster gets, and no matter how much I want a break, what I want even more, is for my dad to have one. This man has been through the ringer, and yet, no matter what happens or how bad things get… he just smiles and tells me how blessed we are. Keep fighting like a warrior, that’s my dad’s motto.
I would totally understand if he gave into the “poor me” pity party because quite frankly this is a rough deal. No one should have to go through this. I don’t care what you’ve done. If you smoked 1,000,000 cigarettes a day, you don’t deserve to have this happen to you.
In addition to the cancer, my dad also has a rare disorder called Paraneoplastic syndrome which is (for us) is actually worse than the cancer. At this point, he has completely lost his hearing, his balance is way off and he is blind in one eye, and it seems like every month or so, we have a “new symptom” pop up to wreak havoc.
Every time he starts to make some progress in the right direction, he gets smacked back down. We start to get one symptom under control and BANG, we get kicked down by another. And yet, this man just keeps fighting.
The thing is, we’re not dealing with a typical case of cancer. Cancer sucks all on its own, but the additional medical related “drama” that we have going on, makes it much, much worse.
It would be so easy to fall into a victim mentality when all this craziness is happening, but what he says to me is “how lucky he is to have this syndrome.” He says without this syndrome, we would never have known about the cancer, and he would have died. “Thank God,” he says, “for this syndrome.”
Because of this syndrome, he has had a lot more time with his family. We’ve had the chance to talk about everything, we’ve spent a tremendous amount of time together and had some really awesome adventures together. He’s had more time with my mom and my sister and time to play games and snuggle with his grandchildren.
And now, because he never gives up 14 months later we are knocking out a bucket list that we NEVER thought we would be doing.
No matter how bad this gets, he tells me not to worry, things are gonna get better. We just need to get ahead of this pain, so the physical therapy can work. No matter how bad things get, he keeps trying, keeps fighting. When he gets knocked down, he gets right back up.
Don’t get me wrong, we have bad days. There have been days where neither one of us are strong. Days, when everything is mess and we are so exhausted and emotionally drained we’re not even sure we’ll make it. But we keep fighting anyway.
Because there are also days where our strength alone should be enough to eradicate cancer. And we LIVE for those days.
My dad trusts in the Lord, always and believes in his plan. We may not understand everything that is happening here, but God has a plan for us and we just have to trust him.
No matter how bad the situation gets, Daddy tells me how lucky and blessed we are… and that keeps me going. When things are bad…and I think about how much he’s been through and how much he doesn’t deserve this and it gives me the fire to keep fighting.
He’s the most inspiring person, I have ever met.
What inspires you to keep fighting?
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